Currently.

Reading: I have been reading: Love in the Driest Season by Neely Tucker. This is an autobiography about an American couple in 1997 who venture to a Zimbabwe orphanage where they start volunteering. The story tells of this couples experience in seeing the consequences of AIDS and economic disaster on a country’s children and the journey they take to adopting a critically ill infant, abandoned in a field on the day she was born.   The Washington Post says it best,  “An extraordinary book of immense feeling and significant social relevance.  Love in the Driest Season challenges anyone–even those numbed by the world’s abundant cruelty–not to care.” I completely agree, this book is not only challenging me but it is changing me….. as a social worker I feel sometimes jaded, you just hear of and see so many horrible things happening to people its hard to see good in the world– and so many problems we see/hear day in and day out that we as a people tend to just overlook or walk on by. It’s sad but I would be a liar if I didn’t say I fall into that category as well.  I can’t take in and worry about all that I hear and see, it feels like to much.  Granted I do have a few special areas of interest (like abortion, adoption, fatherhood rights, and homelessness) that I pay much attention to helping make a change, and I do believe that we each have different passions and areas of interest.    I am an advocate for peace; I want to see children with families not in orphanages, I want to see medicine brought to ALL people in need, I want to see AIDS/HIV only in history books, I want to see people happy and living abundant lives, wherever they are:-)  And MOST of all I want to see children; happy, playing, learning, eating, and being LOVED!!!!!!!!!!!!! I would like to finish this book today:-) its only 266 pages and I’m half way done…it’s been hard to put it down, but currently I’m a little busy to lay down and read.  Maybe today?? Maybe tomorrow?? well maybe next week.

Listening to:  I find myself listening to a variety right now.  80’s music is really soothing and fun for me…it just NEVER gets old to me.  And plus I have been driving my mom to radiation appointments and its deff music we both can agree on!  Also, Thanks to my sister-in-law and niece I have taken a RE-liking to COUNTRY music…OK I said it!!  It really makes me feel warm and fuzzy and reminds me of great times with my brother’s family.  Doesn’t everyone LOVE an Idaho COWGIRL?????lol  <– I have a hot pink shirt that says that!! LOL hehe Also, I find great comfort in many of my favorite Christian artists and just pick shuffle on my iPod so I can hear it ALL!!~

Thinking about:  Anyone who knows me, knows that I’m a thinker!  My overactive brain is sometimes too much; thankfully when I lay down to sleep at night I have learned how to stop all the noise and sleep very peaceful.  I barely remember a dream; and when I do- I always OVERTHINK it!!  ha!!  But lately I have been thinking about my DREAM job….I took my licensing exam last month & PASSED– so now I am a Licensed Social Worker and I can say that without breaking any code of ethics 🙂 HAPPY DAyS!!!  I have been at my parents house in Northern Idaho helping my parents as my mom goes through cancer treatment. I have thought MUCH about cancer, melanoma, the different stages, whats next, the filter to use so you don’t think every pain or bump is CANCER!, my nephews upcoming 5th birthday, my sisters current pregnancy and the arrival of my new niece, where I want to live/work/settle, friends/family/loved ones, will I ever be a mom, will I ever be a wife, will I be okay if I’m not either of those things???,should I adopt/IVF, could I be a single mom?, do I want to be a single mom?, could I be satisfied just loving all the children I have in my life?,  how can I avoid getting melanoma or some other unwanted cancer, do I have cancer and don’t know it?,  world poverty, the slaughter of innocent babies, world homelessness and hunger, President Obama, and how I want to change some laws, the de- criminalization of marijuana, how can we stop crime?, when will my brakes go out on my car?, CANCER, and more CANCER….. and also I think a lot about the people I have lost or am loosing….

Watching:  Two words- FOOD NETWORK!  My mom has had trouble eating lately and she loves to watch food shows; in hopes to get hungry or find something that sounds good! I watch these with her and we talk about what she may like to try to eat.  I love to cook and bake so I am so down with Food Network marathons:-)  When I’m left to myself I like to watch Glades on Netflix:  I love the main characters and I don’t want the seasons to end…but I know they will and I will have to find another show to watch.

Bummed out on: The hard cold reality that CANCER is taking so many people, young and old.  That my mom has to go through all this and how it has effected my entire family.  The great thing is that I have become educated through this journey and I feel like I would be able to share with others so that they would have information and not be so afraid.  My mom has been so tough and strong and barely complains about anything and it just bums me out breaks my heart to watch.  I’m bummed out that the next season of my life I may not be able to be as close to my nephews and nieces as I would like to be…. (so far I have been able to be with them often and I think in the future I won’t be as available to them!) Rats!

Loving:  The opportunity to have this time with my mom and being able to help her and I hope that we will NEVER have to go through this again; but if we do; we may be better prepared for such devastating news.  I’m loving my new-found understanding of myself, God, and life:-) & letting go of unnecessary shame and guilt & PEOPLE Pleasing!  I am loving ALL my new adventures and experiences I have been having lately…I am stepping out in faith into some new areas and its EXCITING to say the least!!  I’m loving watch my brother and sister be AWESOME parents and being a part of seeing that unfold!! I love being an Auntie and am so thankful for my family!!!!  I am loving so much it would be hard to talk about it all– sorta like the THINKING section…I could go on and on:-) I’m a lover not a hater!!!!

This Currently prompt was inspired by Heidi Toevs at Antlers and Roses.

xo Tami

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